Jesus wept. Remember?

And so did I, tonight. It caught me a little off-guard, as I’ve been hanging in there like a champ — my faith has been strong and I have been pressing in to the Lord for wisdom and the Shalom of heaven. I’ve been able to clearly see – what probably amounts to but a fraction of – the ways His hand is in the mix of this world crisis. I see the way we’re naturally resetting, as a society; the ways the all-important towers of security and affection we’ve erected are being dismantled, so that core values of family and simplicity are being restored.

The tower of professionalized youth sports – demolished.
The tower of idolatry for professional sports – squashed.
The tower of achievement and high test scores – obliterated.
The tower of financial security – vaporized.
The tower of perpetual busy-ness – destroyed.

The list goes on.

I see good fruit cropping up.

Fruit of compassion.
Fruit of trust.
Fruit of presence.
Fruit of rest.
Fruit of family connection.

That list also goes on.
(I mean, as the most ill-disciplined writer on the planet, I’ve actually written two blog posts in the last two days. If that isn’t good fruit, I don’t know what is! But, I digress.)

I cling to the opportunity for my kids to shed themselves of the weight of the world they carry on their shoulders in an education system that’s governed by an almighty assessment. I cherish this time when we can all relax so curiosity and individuality, that have been stifled by hyper-rigid (sometimes unrealistic) classroom expectations, can sprout up again in my children.

But I also grieve.

Tonight, after my family went to bed (and we’d survived a shelter-in-place tornado warning), I broke down in sobs. The reality of this … thing … is just so baffling. Tonight, the weight of the reality of it settled in my gut like two tons of cinder blocks.

How is this really happening?  How is this our reality?  
And how long is it going to persist???

I grieve for my children, who left for Spring Break on March 6 and found out today that they won’t get to hug their teachers again (nor possibly even get to see them) for the rest of this year. They said goodbye to their friends, thinking they’d be playing again soon, but now that connection is limited to video chats and texting. (Thank the Good LORD for the technological age we live in, for such an event as this!)

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I share this just to encourage you — if you are grieving this pandemic (or anything else, for that matter) — it’s okay. Don’t let yourself nor others convince you that your faith is weak just because you are grieving the reality of The COVID pandemic.

Grief and Faith are not mutually exclusive, dear ones.

Let yourself feel all the feels. Then, submit them to the Lord, Jehovah Nissi (God our BANNER), who will lift your arms in the battle until we see that it is won.

Of course, Faith also tells us this battle is already won. So remember that, as well.